People watching with a pair of chopsticks

Sure at first glance it doesn't seem like much, but what really is it about a place that makes it a happy place?

As I sat in the restaurant that wasn't any bigger than most living rooms, I was surprised to catch myself smiling; and for no apparent reason either. I was there. At that very moment in time, I was certain that I was being present. In every way, shape, and form, I was letting loose of my senses and they were soaking it all in. Not only did I score a major deal for an ample plate of food for under $5.00, but I was submerged in the environment. To my left I could feel the sun's ray's on my arm, complimented by laughter of a large family who seemed to communicate with smiles. Behind me I had the door opening and closing as patrons came and went. And to my right I had some good friends talking to, and about, the waitress whom one of them was trying to get the phone number from. We all laughed at him and rolled our eyes. This was once of those places where there wasn't a type of person. There were only people. A lot of people in fact, squeezed into a tiny little space. When the blushing waitress brought us our food, I began to look around. As I scanned, I saw an elderly couple saying nothing. It was almost as if their smiles were frozen in time. They just looked into each other's eyes. The warmth radiated from their table and there was no doubt in my mind that they were in love. Love shows. It sticks out like the flame of a candle, perfectly positioned on a table when no other table in the restaurant has one. Restaurants should offer you more than just a full stomach; and sometimes it isn't even the stuff on the menu. It's times like these that seem to give $5.00 so much more value.

Hello Tacoma

So last night we all went to an awesome church service called City Central. Flat out one of the best services I've been to in a long time.

After that the friends we were visiting decided to go to Sonic.

After driving around for an hour, we finally arrived, only to realize we were given the wrong directions. Everyone had already eaten and Ryan had been with them. It was more of a Hey guys, bye guys kind of thing.

Rudy Mena is probably one of my favorite people in the whole world. We can stay up all night talking about the things in life you wouldn't really talk about otherwise. Then you go to bed feeling good and the road you're on isn't so bad after all. We're going to Seattle today/tonight. I can't wait.

Touring Full band!!

First official day of tour.

I've been in an SUV for 13+ hours with 5 amazing people. What have I learned so far?

1. Only half of California is really the "California" we all picture.

2. Daft Punk is awesome to car-dance to.

3. "We're not in Kansas anymore" can be applied to any state.

4. Chevron Gas stations are the place to "kick-it" at 1:30 am in Cottage Grove, OR.

5. Everyone and their mom loves "The Office"

6. I still can't get into "The Office."

Warped tour is tomorrow.

Im excited to see Underoath.

Im ready for Adventure.

Rock-n-water

Tomorrow I embark on my trip with the First Presbyterians high school youth group.

We're going to Rock-N-Water. A camp up near the American River. We're going white water rafting. =)

The last time I went, I was actually in the youth group. That was about 5 years ago.

Wow Im old..

To be honest It caught me off-guard.

Something that would fall under the "Random" Category in my book.

Only because it's random and foreign to my thoughts. All of my thoughts have been consumed by this next coming month. Going on tour, planning parts of it still, getting ready in general. The "Work" list never ceases to end. But thats life right?

Im always surprised as to how God displays His perfect timing, in the middle of my worst. Right when I thought the spring on the scale was going to explode under so much weight, Im sitting in Day 1 (First Pres.'s High School Sunday morning service) and The Rock-N-Water ad comes up. The revelation hit me that I was going to that. Immediately, like a pack of wolves, my thoughts of tour, lists, and business, jumped the thought of me escaping for while. You don't have time for that!!, When will you get the things you need to get done if you go to that?, It's a waste of time-You don't have any!, What will happen if you don't get the things done?

My whole life I've been afraid of failure, and this is a time where being afraid of failure, almost made me fail.

I asked for help. and I heard Hear it is René. An Escape. A chance to focus only on me. To recharge. But..

there is one condition, You have to trust me and give this huge weight to me.

I've been so exhausted that Im gladly doing just that. Trying at least...

With that, I'm eagerly looking forward to this week. A week in another world, so distant from my cell phone, computer, contacts, etc.. It's exactly what I need.

Jesus, You've been right this whole time...Thank you.

Welcome Home.

Today I found out that one of my younger cousins, whom I haven't seen in about 3 years, was in town. He had actually been in town for 2 weeks. For some reason my family members didn't have a number to give him that would put him through to me. My aunt finally called me today telling me to call him. I did. He moved with his family across the country about 6-7 years ago. We haven't kept in touch too well. We had a lot of catching up to do.

Isn't it crazy how someone can be so different from the person who's lived in your memories? Maybe not in good or bad way, but simply in a different way. Grown up is a phrase that comes to mind. But what do people grow to be? adults? Well then what's an adult? A full time worker who puts in 40-60 hours in the office, A graduate from College, a single mom, an 18 year old who's been kicked out of his house? I guess finances have a lot to being grown up huh? Being able to support yourself. Paying for everything. Not asking or depending on anyone else for money. Maybe taking responsibility for everything we should be responsible for? But there is much, much more to growing up then simply becoming an adult.

The first thing I noticed when he got in the car were the types of questions he would ask. He didn't ask the generic, easy questions. His interests were much deeper, and more real. A genuine interest. "What do you do in your spare time?", "What do you want to be when you grow up?", "Why are you and brother so close?" ...When my brother and I never speak..."

Questions that let you know that the one asking is asking because he or she seeks something. Something to learn, something to take and apply to his own life. It's always interesting to find someone who in a lot of ways reminds you of yourself, and yet, is nothing like you at all. We all like to think people are put in our path for one reason or another. I think that's a good reminder to keep close by.

Hanging out with The New Divide

So The New Divide (myspace.com/thenewdivide) Came down to hang out and take some promos (myspace.com/anthropologyimages) and it was quite the night. Not only did we take pictures, we created pieces of timeless art along with timeless memories. Aaron was doing backflips while Jess was shooting him; getting some killer shots, Doug tried getting his very cool tattoo in as many shots as possible, and Andy was just being himself.

We went to Denny's afterwards and found out you could feed a whole family at Denny's for $6.

Andy got the create your own slam and got "4 pancakes."

We got the order in, and out comes 5 plates with 2 pancakes on each of them. It was a funny picture. Such a fun night. Now we're all on our computers while some of are starting to fall asleep. Great night.

Pause and let go

Im still processing the thoughts and emotions of being in Mexicali for a week, so those blogs will come later. But now that Im back into my old lifestyle, of going to school, finding a job, finding money, looking for a sign I'm doing something right. Something I learned about myself while being in Mexico was how easy it is for me to worry. It's something I have to battle with every single day of my life.

Worry is the opposite of trusting God. It's me saying, I don't know If I trust God. But he did tell me one thing for sure, while I was covered in dirt and sweat. I need to stop worrying.; more specifically, pray. It takes so much off of my back when I stop trying to tell my life what to do, especially when It wont listen to me.... I love the fact that God knows what I don't. 

Bagel bites

I still remember the old commercials when bagel bites first came out. 

Well...I remember the song at least. 

As Im eating these delicious little mixes of bagels and pizza I think about what came first?

Is it a pizza turned into a bagel, or a bagel turned into a pizza? 

I guess sort of a chicken or egg type deal. 

Either way, It still tastes good. =)

Naps

Lately, sleep has been a chore for me. So I just took a two hour nap, & it was absolutely refreshing. I love waking up early and taking naps in the mid afternoon sun. It seems to make my day longer. I welcome them as often as they come.

And the result is...

Going to bed at 2 a.m. with a thoughts as busy as calculus problems took its toll and resulted in me waking late and therefore being late to my class, that I have to drive 35 min too. However there is something about waking up in the morning and knowing that you have "extra" time, that makes you feel as though you've just won a million dollars. "Congratulations! You just won extra time!". Time is so valuable. Especially in a time where time seems to become more and more of a stranger every day.
However, that wasn't the case this morning. I felt as though time had abandoned me on a desert island and sailed away on a ship going as fast as it could.
When I was recording "A little 19 in Every1" time seemed to be as unfamiliar as a foreign language. We would walk into the studio around 10 a.m. and be in there, literally, all day. I would walk out the door of the studio, without glancing at my cell phone, expecting to walk to into the "Beautiful" 110 degree weather of Fresno, only to walk into a dark night (not batman) shadowed by the moon, bright stars and planets.
"Didn't we only track guitars today?"
"Yup, have a good night man"
"You too dude"

Who would've known playing a guitar all day could literally mean all day.
I stopped and thought to myself, "Music is timeless" and I laughed as I walked towards my car.
Speaking of time, I need to get ready for my next class. Watch the clock or the clock will walk away from you.

"And that's my new philosophy"

Last week I attend (and had a minor role in) a school play a few friends of mine were in. A friend of mine sang a song, and did a very good job, about her "new philosophy" and it made me think. In my philosophy class some pretty "out there" ideas are stated. For example, "Movement is impossible....Kings only rule and have no knowledge, while philosophers do....'Doggie's have doggie virtues that makes it more excellent in itself'....as do knives....Nothing exists, if you don't see it's shadow ( like the words you're reading right now)... Pretty bold statements that are only ideas. If you really look at it, we live in a world full of ideas. Everything is made up by someone who thought about it long enough.
Lately I've been around people's philosophy more than usual. In one of my classes, which is more of a philosophy class then my philosophy class, we are asked our opinions on things. We are encouraged to share our thoughts. People are expect to know that everyone is different and not everyone agrees on everything. What I learned in this class a few days ago, is that some people will love you if you agree with them, and try to embarrass you and gang up on you, if you say something different. It was a difficult class. But I didn't walk out of there feeling defeated, or even angry. I felt good, because I didn't stand down for what I believed in (unlike other people in the class) or even offend any opposing ideas. I welcomed them and simply ask why they believed that thought. A simple question. Sadly, what I got was a class full insults, rolling of eyes, mocking, laughing, and immaturity. I was pretty disappointed. It was also at that point when I realized people will refuse to listen to you, even if you're making pretty valid points. I'm having a hard time remembering what words of mine weren't twisted and used against me. It seemed as though the teacher called on me to state my opinion only to get everyone else "participating". People will do, and say anything to avoid hearing a point, maybe being wrong, or feeling defeated. But it's ok. People who are usually unsure, or who don't have all the answers tend to freak out about things like that. So it's ok. I wont try and pretend to know and understand everything around me, and know how every human being thinks and acts. All I can do is love on people and that's what Ill remain doing. Because without love, nothing makes life worth living.

Some people find it hard to discern if they're still sleeping when their eyes are widely introduced to a fuzzy ceiling in the morning. Other's wait all night for the relief of dreams and escape from the world outside they're window.
What's my case? I wish I could be as tired as I am when I wake up in the morning, when I am wanting so badly to be asleep along with the rest of the world at 2 a.m.
Maybe perhaps getting off the computer would help...
Goodnight world.